float_on_alright: (natasha says this looks bad)
We’re watching Captain America 2: Winter Soldier right now and I’m just getting all kinds of feels. I’ve grown so fond of Bucky in general and I love the relationship between him and Steve. Marvel has made a lot of mistakes (alright, they’ve done a lot of things I think are mistakes), but they’ve done an amazing thing with their portrayal of these two shits. God, with you to the end of the line??? Ugh so emotional. Like honestly, why do they have to make me cry about stupid boys? It’s very upsetting.

I mentioned writing more Avengers fanfic so of course I have writer’s block now. But that’s okay, I just have to keep writing and the words will eventually come. I think a lot of this “block” is that the list of prompts in the BigDamnTable is so  along. There are fifty of them. I’ve seven now, I do believe. I really want to write more Darcy/Natasha. I love Darcy/Clint and Natasha/Clint and let’s be real—I have about 8 million ships sailing on the Avengers’ Ocean. So many, many ships in so many, many different ways. 

One I definitely don’t ship is Natasha/Bruce. That was just weird. Sorry. Maybe it was just that actors didn’t—in my opinion—have that kind of chemistry. I thought they had great friendship chemistry but romantic? No. And I hate that they keep pushing Natasha around as a romantic interest. The way they treat her in Winter Soldier is perfect in my opinion. She’s Steve’s bro, she’s sarcastic, she’s brave, she’s stubborn, she’s smart, she’s vulnerable… like oh my God. Everyone should write her the way they wrote her in Winter Soldier. 
 A
float_on_alright: (hardison what did i say)
So a couple of days ago I ranted about dating girls versus dating boys, and like a mess of other things and the reason that I mentioned it was because I thought mayyyybe one of my coworkers was maybe attempting to set me up with her daughter. I still wasn’t sure what was happening yesterday and I asked one of my other coworkers if he knew if the lady who had mentioned her daughter had anyone in her family who was queer. He said that he didn’t think so. He said that said coworker was pretty conservative Christian though her daughters had gotten her to lighten up a little on that front. My friend Emily said she thought the lady was (and I quote) “just being a mom.” 

I honestly felt a little disappointed? I mean the daughter sounded fun and as much as I don’t want to do the whole “single and ready to mingle”/online dating profile/etc. thing, I do eventually want to meet someone special. 

So I got back to work after lunch where I had said conversations with dude coworker (who may or may not be flirting with me? Also not sure on this?? God, for someone who is usually pretty good at reading people, I am shit at reading people’s interest in me) and my friend Emily and ran into lady coworker who has said geeky daughter. I hadn’t seen her the rest of the day and I gave some sort of greeting and she was like “Oh Kate, I gave my daughter your number” and some other stuff about her looking for missing ornaments for her tree and that she might reach out to me. 

And I’m thinking yeah, okay her mom could just be “being a mom” or whatever but this really feels like a maybe set up? Which of course I tell my friend and so then we’re trying to figure it out and get all of no where. 

Still, it doesn’t matter either way if she doesn’t call or text me. 

GUESS WHAT SHE TEXTED ME LAST NIGHT.

We’ve texted A LOT over the last 27 hours or so and it’s been really, really fun. So I started thinking, okay at least I know we have a lot in common and we can probably be friends. 

Of course I’m still trying to figure out if she’s queer. It doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll be interested in me that way, but I mean, I want to know if I at least won’t be rejected based on gender. 

Quick side note: I recognize that most of the world can say that they only feel attraction to people of one, specific, gender. But for real, that seems fucking crrraazzzzyyy to me. How anyone can be like “I’m not attracted to anyone in that gender” is LOST on me. I mean, look at some of the people out there. No exceptions? Not ever? Frankly? Does.not.compute. Asexuality I get. Straight up not really being into the whole sex thing or only being into the sex thing under specific circumstances or if you have a certain level of emotional investment, I totally get. But just like “no, that person has a penis, I’m automatically not interested”... well, okay cis-men on a whole are kind of awful so maybe that’s sort of understandable. Even then though, I would get the “I don’t date men” but I don’t think I’d get the “not attracted” to them. Anyway, I know it’s a real thing that people are like “totally straight” or “completely gay,” but it just doesn’t make sense to me. 

… I need to go to bed. I have work in the morning. Ugh. 

Anyway, back to my story. 

She and I are texting about stuff and I won’t give the entire run down but she mentioned that she had recently broken up with someone who she also works with at her part time job and that they’d been friends for a long time before they started dating and so they’re trying to work out being friends and coworkers again. Now, this part time job (she’s a technology teacher full time) is at a Hallmark store. I realize that it’s sexist to say that straight men don’t work in Hallmark stores so I won’t say that but I will say that I have literally never seen a man working in a Hallmark Store. So I press and I keep my pronouns neutral because thus far she’d been very careful not to have to use any pronouns (only words like “friend” and “coworker” which are totally gender neutral). I told her she didn’t have to talk about it but she did. And her ex is a woman!! And she explained that she feels the way I feel about attraction and gender and it was AMAZING. 

We’ve been texting furiously about Harry Potter and our dislike of weird food textures and Christmas ornaments and just fun stuff. 

Tomorrow she’s going to make breakfast for dinner and we’re going to work on a puzzle and maybe watch a movie and I’m just really freaking excited. 

Now I really, really need to go to bed so I can shower in the morning and wear something cute tomorrow. Night y’all! 

Happy Kate

Sep. 19th, 2017 10:21 pm
float_on_alright: (hardison what did i say)
I have three days left at Scholastic. I’m trying to get a podcast done before Friday which should be interesting. I was going to do it tonight, but I decided not to instead, lol. I got into the book I was listening to, but also I just didn’t wanna tonight. I just didn’t want to do anything if I’m honest. I should probably be in bed already but instead, I’m rewatching bits of Midnight Texas because I’m obsessed and I want to live in the world where my ship is canon. Because I have so few straight ‘ships, I rarely get to enjoy this. Or at least it feels that way. Granted, even a few of my straight ships didn’t happen. In the Avengers movie universe I was hoping that Clint Barton would end up with Darcy, even though they literally never meet in canon. I don’t even remember how that started for me, but there you go. And then I thought, if not Darcy then he should definitely be with Natasha. But no, they didn’t do that either. 

Actually, that still annoys me. If they weren’t going to hook him up with Bobbi Morse or Natasha Romanoff like he does in the comic books for a while then he should've been a sketchy, broke bachelor in a crappy ass apartment in … Queens or the Bronx or whatever borough that man is living in during Matt Fraction's series. This whole thing with him in a farmhouse and fifteen children, just does not ring true for me. I don’t know what it is about that scenario but I just cannot buy it. It’s not that I don’t like the actress who plays his wife. I do like her, she’s great. And her character is great! At least what little we know of her. Supporting him and believing in him and trusting him through all the crazy, stupid, avengers crap. I’d really like to know how she handled the brainwashing thing from the first go round, because I think she would’ve handled it like a boss. But the direction they took with his private life still pisses me off. 

I did get Grimm, which I’m pretty thankful about it and I mean, Wayhaught GIVES ME LIFE. Honestly, I could probably live for centuries on the power of Nicole Haught and Waverly Earp’s incredible love for each other. And of course my original OTP was Ron and Hermione. Do they have a ship name? I never thought about it. I didn’t really get into Harry Potter fanfiction for all that I believe the Harry Potter series is one of the best things ever to exist. 

I’m not sure what point I had in writing all this tonight. I think I just needed to brain vomit for a bit. 

The book I’m reading is really good, and really interesting and you know I love a good gay romance. 

And now I really do need to go to bed but instead I’m watching bits of the last episode of Grimm because I mentioned how much I love Nick and Adalind. I wonder if I’m in the majority there or in the minority on that. Those two started as enemies and Adalind has done some pretty shitty things, but even when she was a villian I loved her. I realize that my love of Adalind is something I have rambled about previously but it seems relevant. 

Some of my other ‘ships include Root and Shaw who were in love with each other in canon but of course one of them died which means I pretty much refuse to count them. If one of them ends up dead, then they’re not canon any more and I can’t live in the happy place of a canon couple. Sorry, not sorry. 

I was well invested in Mary and Marshall in “In Plain Sight” and I’m still pissed about them not working out -- another thing I have bitched about in the past. 

Steve and Danny on Hawaii 5-0 were my very first fanfic ship and if there are any shows that write characters like they’re in a long term relationship better than the writers who write that show, I haven’t seen it. I’ve seen a shit ton of canon couples who don’t get written that well. I’ve mostly made peace with the fact that they’ll never get together in the show. 

The ship I’ve shipped the longest and possibly the hardest is Sterek, probably. Wayhaught is a close second but because they get to play out on the show I don’t obsess about the fanfic as much. 

You know what, Emily Andreas continues to be my hero because she gave me Bo and Lauren and Mark and Vex. I’m still upset that Hale died, but at least I know that Kenzi will join him in the afterlife per the almost wedding in season… four I think? God Bless Emily Andreas. 

Gosh, it’s really nice to have canon ships. It just really, really is. It was so rare for years, and now I have a few. Some of them are even queer! I have Hollstien, Wayhaught, Mark x Vex, Chuy and Joe, Camille and Amanda, Magnus and Alec, Maggie and Alex. I think I’m even forgetting some! I’m desperately holding my breath for Alex and Magnus shit in Ship of the Dead. Like I am jumping out of my skin for that next book. 

I really am rambling a lot, aren't I? It must be bedtime. 


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Kate

June 2021

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