May. 6th, 2017

float_on_alright: procrastination is hard work (procrastination is hard work)

I’m reading “The Artist’s Way” right now, well I just started it really. One of the things she’s mentions is “morning pages” - three handwritten pages every morning to help get your shit out of your way at the beginning of the day (or at least that’s what it sounds like from what I’ve read so far which again hasn’t been much). I find that idea intriguing and I'm looking forward to seeing what other things she has in store. She recommends reading the book through once before you get started with the activities. I have a copy checked out from the library but I found a copy on ThriftBooks and it’s currently on it’s way to me. I’m hopeful that it will arrive today in the mail so that it will be there when I get home tomorrow. But it isn't a big deal if it takes a few more days for that book and the other couple of books I ordered to get to me especially since I have the library book for a few more days. 

Intellectually, I know that the more you work on being creative, the more you practice being creative, the more easily creativity will happen and flow. But I think my subconscious has been terrified that I’ll “use up” all my creativity and that it will be gone and I’ll have nothing left and then I’ll be empty and it’ll kill me - not in the literal sense, but that I’ll be a husk with no real person left in me. That's not how creativity works. 

When I was writing consistently, 90% less writer’s block than when I was just writing when it struck me. Writing stories begets writing stories. The more that with people about writing and the stories, the more story ideas I had - so many I could rarely keep up with them. I have experience that says I’ll be a more productive writer the more that I write so how it is I still have that fear, I’m not sure. I’m thinking that maybe it’s because I’ve never addressed the fear itself - not head on. Or maybe it’s a fear that will always be something I have to face head on, day after day. And maybe that’s okay. Afterall, the only way to face that fear every day is to write every day. So, here I go, Day 6, to write another story. 


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