(no subject)

It’s well after 4 am and I’m up. I’m sure I’m tired. I’m positive I’m tired. It’s just that I don’t feel tired. Normally by now I can barely hold my eyes open. Last night when I was writing the update for my goals and what I’d gotten done, I actually couldn’t keep my eyes open. I had to type parts of it with my eyes closed because I was so tired that it took all my concentration to hold them open. If I closed them, I had just enough brain function to type what I wanted to say.

I’m typing this because I feel like journaling might actually prompt me to feel more tired. A lot of nights once I start journaling that’s when I really start to feel the day. I’m hoping that the weight of sleepiness will nudge me towards actually laying down to go to sleep. I think it will in a bit. I know I’m tired underneath all this.

I really wanted a day to do nothing, but I’d forgotten about a work thing I’d volunteered to be part of today and so I ended up racing to work around midday. After that, everything was thrown off. I had planned for BINGO in the evening, but that meant that I had a couple of hours between the time at the YMCA for work and the Staff Bingo night. Bingo was fun and I enjoyed myself. I’m glad I went. It also meant dinner and desserts and drinks without having to spend money.

Thinking about how tired I was yesterday posting my goals update, I thought I’d better look over the post. Most of it was okay. Some of it was totally incomprehensible, but I know what I meant to so I tried re-writing those spots. I don’t know if they’re any better now, because I’m definitely starting to feel the tired, but I think the update made the post better than it was.

There is one part though, that I just have no idea what I was saying. I think it was supposed to be some sort of idiom? I don’t know. I don’t know if I fell asleep just enough to have a weird dream while being just awake enough to type something out or what. Here’s the statement:

I don’t have special hay for my horse, but I’ll be sure to give him some carrots.

I mean, what? I have a coworker whose daughter has a horse and she was telling us recently about the different Hays so that’s my best guess.

Well, I was write. I can’t hold my eyes open now.