Where do we go from here? (Part 5 of 6)
Mar. 4th, 2011 06:34 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Title: Where do we go from here
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Rating: R (for Language - no sex - yet)
Word Count: ~ 2,100
Warnings: None, really
Spoilers: Explicit for 1.8, may be references to other eps.
Disclaimer: H50 belongs to me muuuahahahahhahahaha! ... in my dreams (CBS has all the rights) - which is why I spend
This is dedicated to
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A few beers, a reminder from Chin that he was not alone, and the (very) few hours’ sleep he managed to get helped clear Danny’s head a little, and he realized that McGarrett (he couldn’t think of him as Steve for the moment, it just hurt too much) had been right about at least one thing. Sang Min knew the leak in HPD and while he may not give up the information but Danny did have to try, if only because it would prove Meka’s innocence. Turned out McGarrett’s advice was solid, because he was able to negotiate something with Sang Min, though he was truly less than pleased with what Min wanted. At least he knew if he could get Ochoa to give him the link then Min would confirm it and Meka’s name would be cleared.
When he left the prison, he wasn’t sure whether or not he was surprised to find Steve sitting on his car waiting. His truck was nowhere in sight so he must have been dropped here, which meant he was pretty confident Danny wasn’t going to leave him stranded. The thought had crossed his mind, but he sighed and decided to give him a chance first, besides he couldn’t very well drive off with him sitting on his car. Steve was like a drug he just couldn’t quit. Even so he was holding back. Steve looked relaxed, like he was just enjoying the sunshine, but Danny knew better, those crossed arms and cool demeanour meant he was hurting, which made Danny feel marginally better, but didn’t mean he was going to let him off the hook easily.
“What are you doing here?”
“I came to ask you a question.”
“You did? Well, if it’s to the prom I already have a date, but I’m flattered, thank you.”
“That’s funny. Look man, I know you’re pissed, alright. I’m just can’t figure out if it’s because they told you Meka was dirty or if it’s because you found out he actually was dirty and you didn’t know about it.”
“Okay, listen to me this is not an ego thing, okay? This is about Meka.” Danny tried to explain about what family meant to Meka. He tried to say all the same things he had said the day before only this time with a little less volume and malice. Basically, he tried to sound reasonable, but Steve still didn’t get it. Finally, Danny thought he might have a way to get through to Steve, assuming Steve trusted him at all.
“Okay, alright then, let me ask you a question. Let’s say I.A. accused me of skimming off a drug lord and they showed you a stack of evidence that suggested I did it. Would you believe it?” Danny didn’t get the chance to hold his breath before Steve answered,
“No, I wouldn’t,” as naturally as he breathed, no hesitation, not nanosecond of a pause, it clearly took him no thought to answer, which made Danny feel a hell of a lot better. Chin was right, Steve didn’t mistrust him; this was merely a matter of stubborn focus as only a McGarrett could manage.
“Why not?” Danny asked. Steve looked like he might answer for a moment, then paused, confused. He started to say something again, but he’d obviously just realized he had no answer other than, “Because you could never do something like that”.
“Exactly.” Danny said. Steve laughed. Danny wasn’t ready to laugh, and he still wasn’t sure where that left them, but he was feeling better.
“Okay.” Steve said. Danny was pretty sure he just won an argument with Steve, which, in his opinion should have come with a fucking medal or at least a trophy, but for now he was just thankful to have his Steve in Meka’s corner because there was no one better to have in the ring with you and there was certainly no one Danny wanted more. He still asked just to hear Steve concede defeat, even if he never used that word.
Danny decided that he wouldn’t examine just how much better he was feeling about the case and everything else now that he felt like he had his Steve back (shit, his Steve? Oh, he was so, so screwed). Cage didn’t even faze Danny when he came in yelling, getting in his face and generally being a dick. Danny was even on the verge of laughing about it.
Of course the ride to take down Ochoa did put a damper on his spirits because grease sleaze turned C.I. was the second most annoying person in the van and full of helpful statements like “We’re all going to die”. Steve won most annoying since he was currently wearing the same mischievous expression he wore during the last case when they were chasing down an armed and dangerous criminal (this would be Danny’s life now and he would never forgive Rachel for moving here. Although, if the weekend before last meant anything, he just might have to thank Rachel and that would really be awful).
“What are you smirking at?”
“Oh, uh just the whole no tie thing, I like it. You’re starting to look like you actually fit in here.” Danny focused on his gun, because otherwise he might have taken that as a compliment and blushed, even as it was, his cheeks felt suspiciously flushed.
“Yeah, well don’t get used to it, okay?” It was the last chance he got to laugh for a bit since things at the drug deal did not go the way they’d hoped.
He knew that of the people out there today, Steve was the person he should be the least worried about, however, Steve was standing behind a tank of what looked like diesel fuel which was either tactically genius or moronic, maybe both and very definitely crazy. At this point the only thing keeping Danny focused on the problem at hand was the fact that this particular issue involved the bullets flying. In some ways the firefight went on for ages, but Danny knew that no more than a couple of minutes had passed before it was over.
When it was over, well there just weren’t words.
“I’m sorry Danny,” and the pain in Steve’s face portrayed just how sorry he was that his plan had not brought the truth to the surface like they’d hoped. Danny felt like he had too much to express and no words with which to do it, and he just had to walk away from the body. For a while, he stood off to the side. He knew that Steve had taken over, taken control, because things were happening around him, HPD seemed to be taking over the crime scene, bodies were taken away, someone managed to chase down greasy and take him back into custody.
Steve made sure HPD had control of the scene before he found SUV that HPD had brought over to carry the four of them back to HQ and their own cars. The vehicle they’d travelled over in was now a part of an active crime scene. He could feel Steve’s eyes dart to him on the ride back, and though he knew he was being quieter than usual (all right, he was silent and he knew damn well and good that it was unheard of for him), but Sing Min pointing at Meka’s picture and saying “that’s not him” wouldn’t be enough to prove that Meka wasn’t the leak now that Ochoa was dead.
He was so focused on that, he didn’t even argue when Steve took his keys and steered him towards the passenger door. When they reached it, Steve stretched around him for the door handle and Danny turned suddenly, to face Steve. They weren’t touching, but Steve had his hand on the door behind Danny, the taller man was leaning over him, so it would have looked like an embrace. Maybe they weren’t touching, but Danny could still feel Steven, like something with a static charge drifting over his skin.
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“You believed me about Meka and tried to help me prove it to the rest of the world.”
“I should’ve had your back from the beginning. Danny… Danny I’m so sorry.”
“You had my back,”
“But I –”
“No ‘buts’. I never would have been able to get on the case without you, you know that. Had I still been Meka’s partner, I wouldn’t have been able to do anything that we’ve done. Hell, I might have ended up in that fire pit with him. Besides, you helped rope a guy to the hood of my car and went around the city with me while I drove around like a mad man.”
“But I –”
“Shut up,” he said, but he smiled. It wasn’t a full smile and there was no laughter behind it, but it felt good to do it anyway, if only for a moment.
“Let me take you home.” Steve opened the door for him then. Danny thought about arguing that he was not “the girl”, but it felt so nice to have someone looking out for him, he decided not to object. Neither of them spoke on the way home. Danny was still reeling.
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Neither of them spoke on the way home. Steve had so much to say to Danny, but now wasn’t the right time. He was going to have to be patient, which was the one thing he’d never excelled at, not really or at least he didn’t feel like he did, but he was determined to help Danny heal; he had after all just lost the first friend he’d made on the island (his only friend before Steve forced him onto the 5-0). Meka was probably the one person who kept Danny sane between the visits with his daughter until the team. Suddenly, he was very thankful for Meka who’d looked after his (he very much hoped) Danny until Steve could find him.
He went in the apartment with Danny, though neither of them had broken the silence yet. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence, just a sad one. Steve poked around in the fridge, found something that looked vaguely edible and microwaved it for the two of them. Danny didn’t eat much, and he seemed tired in a way that Steve had never seen him look. Steve cleaned up after they’d eaten. It was around nine when he finally got up to leave. Danny had been giving the banged up Ikea coffee table more attention than was really warranted.
“Listen, I’m going to take your car if that’s alright, I’ll be back in the morning around 730, okay? We’ll have breakfast, I make a mean omelette and I expect you to kiss the chef.” Danny finally looked up then. Steve recognized the fractured look in Danny’s eyes that could only result from losing family while thinking “I should have been there”. It made him ache.
“Don’t go. Please.” Steve wouldn’t have been able to say no if threatened with a nuclear blast at that point. He settled himself on the couch, laying down, tucking his legs behind Danny so that he could then pull Danny length wise against him. He used one arm as a pillow and the other he wrapped around Danny, pressing him hard against his chest. He was sure Danny hadn’t slept much the night before, because he was asleep in a matter of a few minutes, not snoring exactly, but breathing in a heavy, deep way, Steve was sure meant he was asleep.
Steve lay there a while thinking of all the places he’d slept during his time in the SEALs and Navy Intelligence, not to mention all the times he’d gone without. He’d gotten lot more sleep in general since he’d moved back to Hawaii, but it was still a luxury for him to get to sleep more than two hours here and there. Tonight though, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to sleep at all (at least at first). A protective instinct was waking inside him and he felt like he was should be keeping watch while Danny slept.
He reminded himself that he wasn’t out in the field or on a mission. Danny’s apartment was locked up tight, and he was here to comfort Danny more than he was there to protect him. He closed his eyes, and just listened to the sound of Danny’s breath, calm and steady. Danny was warm, and it was spreading through him, easing all those tense places in his body. There were far more comfortable couches out there, never mind beds, but if taking one of those meant he wouldn’t have Danny securely tucked against him, there was no way he’d trade.
(This List is my Master)