Mar. 27th, 2017

float_on_alright: claudia wide eyed (claudia the eyes)

I have made a terrible mistake. Well, okay. Maybe I should go with “I have made a very annoying mistake”. I don’t know how I did it but I somehow I managed to over-report how many words I’ve written on the progress form for - poopy. I suppose it’s possible that I inadvertently reported the numbers as minutes instead of words? Who knows. So now the question is, do I explain that I’ve messed it up or do I just try to keep up with it? Of course, to keep up with it, I’d have to write 5,589 words by the time I go to bed on Friday which could be a bit of a challenge. That's over 1,000 words a day, and while I have made it to over 1000 words a day on several occasions, I haven’t managed it to do it with any kind of consistency or any more than two days in a row so I don’t know if I can make it. The good news is I have met my goal for the month, and I’m not getting “extra credit” for the overage - so to speak - since you only get credit for whether or not you make your goal. Part of me, though, really wants to try to make it.

It’s just after 10:30 as I write this so and I should go to bed at a decent hour tonight since I have to shower in the morning and not be late since we have corporate people in the office this week. I have my clothes and shoes laid out for tomorrow because I figure it would probably save me time in the morning. It’s not that it should take me long to pull clothes onto my body, but I often don’t have enough brain cells functioning in the morning to make smart choices that early. Sometimes it takes me seven minutes just to work out a shirt and pants combo that doesn’t leave me 1) wearing a black shirt with black pants, 2) wearing a gray shirt with gray pants, 3) wearing a dark blue shirt that - you guessed it - matches several of my blue jeans, or 4) wearing a combination of blue and black or black and brown that should just not happen. It’s better to take that decision off “morning me’s” hands. I should make a habit of this, and maybe that will be a new goal I add to my list of “Kate is going to be an adult …  like really … or at least mostly and I mean it this time” things. 

It can’t hurt me to try. The worst that’s going to happen is that I don’t make it and honestly that’s not a big deal. Or at least, that’s what I’m going to tell myself. 

Do any of you get the daily quote emails from GoodReads? If so, you probably saw this quote a week ago, but it’s been on my mind since they sent it. 
“Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on.” ~ Louis L’amour 

This guy wrote over 100 works; I think we have about 35 titles by him at my library branch alone. A lot of his works were short, and I know writers like Nora Roberts (her ‘in death’ series has like 48 titles in it) probably have him beat by now. Regardless, I think the point stands. I’ve been reading a lot about writing, and everything says write every day even if it’s crap (which is comforting). I read that Stephen King writes at least 2000 words a day.  (I would be curious to know who has written more pages: Stephen King or Nora Roberts but that’s another post.) Part of me wants to be like “Oh sure if I didn’t have a full-time job, an hour commute each way, insert other excuses here, I could write 2000 words a day.” 

How can I say that? I have very few responsibilities outside of my job - no spouse, no kids, shit I barely have to take care of my dog. How can I pretend that I don’t have plenty of time? I still have to work at going to bed at a decent hour, so it’s not like I’m committing to getting loads of sleep either. I’ve been spending my time doing what exactly? Well, obviously the last month or so has been different. I have been better at getting decent amounts of sleep, spending time each day writing, and dedicating myself to improving my environment and mind overall. It’s unfathomable how much time I was wasting to Paradise Bay, and there are still a lot of moments when I itch to play those games again. I still have Solitaire and Sudoku on my phone, but only play if I’m also listening to a book or if I’m watching TV with mom since it’s difficult to get anything written or edited while we’re together. That’s okay - I’m not going to criticize myself for spending a couple of hours with my mom though I do try to use at least part of it for something productive.

One of the things that continue to be a bit of a time suck is social media, mostly Facebook which I find odd because it’s one of my least favorite platforms at this point (of the ones that I use), but this too is on my list of “cutting back” items. The idea is just to check and see what things need responses from me and then to maybe post something funny, but I do tend to get sucked into just scrolling endlessly until I realize I have spent thirty minutes doing absolutely nothing. I think I may have to start limiting myself to 15 minutes a day. I may allow myself two sets of 15 minutes for a while because s would be good practice cutting myself off and not getting stuck in the loop. I’ll probably have to use stopwatches to start. 

Speaking of self-improvement, my quest to clean and declutter has migrated to my bathroom. I did a good bit of gutting today. The stacks of stuff are getting RIDICULOUSLY OUT OF HAND, and I filled THREE BAGS OF TRASH TODAY. Okay, it was more like two because some of the stuff was heavy and I didn’t feel the bags would survive the trip to the can outside if I filled them any further, but I think the point stands. I started going through my make up. I made an “airport travel” bag of liquids and a bag of things to replace the things in that bag as they run out. That felt good. I then separated some of my other stuff by lip, eye, foundation, etc. and I did some weeding. I’m going to have to try on nearly every lipstick again to see if I like it then wipe it off with makeup remover so I can try the next one. Needless to say, I decided to put that project off for another day. 

Tomorrow I need to go to the gym and sign my cancellation paperwork. I’m annoyed because I thought my contract was 24 months, but it must have been only 18 months, and I could have gotten out of it a few months ago. At least I didn’t decide to put it off until April or May as I had considered. I haven’t been in at least year. I don’t think I’ve been since before I had my surgery, but I could have gone once or twice after that. It’s a nice gym, but I’m not interested in running/jogging right now. Weight loss wise it didn’t do a lot for me and entertainment wise, I have more fun with the Zumba on my Wii, not to mention that it can be pretty rough on your body in general. I can’t swear to the accuracy, but it is my understanding that no matter how fast you do it, you’re going to burn the same amount of calories for a mile. Granted you can get more miles done in a period if you can do them faster, but I can listen to audiobooks when I walk, and my dog benefits too. Plus, I like walking for the sake of walking sometimes.

I need to get to bed, so I’m going to wind down for the night, but I am hoping I’ll remember to write about my AirPods tomorrow. I just got them today and have been trying them out for the first time.


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